So let’s talk about a question that I get asked a lot. What do I do when I’m the only person in my immediate circle who is going through this process of awakening to a deeper wisdom, to intuition or soul? Do I talk about it? And why does it have to feel so lonely?
I’m sharing 3 tips with you today, on how to move forward in ways that are kind & empowering to everyone involved (you included). So that you’ll know what to do when you’re feeling lonely on this path of spiritual awakening ♥
I want you to know that this is a very common experience. And we’ll dive into it, together, right here and now, so you can walk away with a heightened sense of serenity, a sense of okay-ness if you will, and some tools for making empowered decisions.
We use the word awakening because it’s very much like waking up. The blinders fall off. The veil drops. And you may feel the way you do when you wake up from a vivid dream – disoriented, needing to get your bearings, in a strange new world where things are slightly different from how they were before.
And just to go back to that dream analogy, have you ever had a dream experience where you felt totally out of place in your dream world – walking around its landscape with a deep sense of isolation, the people around you doing seemingly incomprehensible things that made no sense – and you feeling so disconnected and so lost, wandering around not knowing how to find relief or resolution? I know I have. It’s a deeply disconcerting dream to wake up from. One that lingers for days. And, yes, that is what it can feel like when you first realize that no one else in your immediate environment is having this same experience as you… this awakening to a different awareness of the world.
Not your family. Not your friends. No one at work or in your communities… You’re seemingly the only one.
This is why it hurts so much
REASON 01: YOU WANT TO SHARE
I believe the reason we feel this ‘aloneness’ so intensely is because as humans, we LOVE to share. We especially love to share the things that make us feel good, that lift our spirits and our hearts, that send our soul soaring. That create HAPPINESS.
And so, waking up feels REALLY really good, right? I mean, how excited were you, are you, now that you’ve stumbled upon this whole new dimension to life – one that feels good, where you’re tapped into endless possibility, where every moment and every experience seems to hold the potential for infinite joy? Where there’s actual real-life magic? If you’re anything like me, your heart is bursting at the seams to tell everybody about this, to share and help them access this beauty and wisdom and joy too, right?
I want to share with you how I’ve moved forward with this. First though, we need to look at another reason why isolation feels so painful:
REASON 02: YOU FEEL SCARED BECAUSE MAYBE YOU’RE THE CRAZY ONE
When you look around and see that none of your family, friends, community or colleagues seem to be sharing this experience, it adds to our doubts and fears that we might be doing something that isn’t completely normal.
Because when you start to wake up to something else besides logic, you may have a very intense, visceral response to that, one of doubt and anxiety –
because we’ve never really been told that this ‘non-logical wisdom’ is a valid source of guidance, too.
Most of us have been told, over and over, that we can only trust what can be proven. That there’s only reason and logic. That anything that isn’t black and white on paper isn’t really to be trusted. The result of which is, your thinking minds is deeply invested in the purely analytical approach to life.
It doesn’t feel good when all around you, everyone you know and care about just continues on as if nothing has changed (it hasn’t, for them). You’re coming up against this version of reality that everyone says is ‘normal’ – whilst you’re seeing a much WIDER reality now, and the disconnect between the two is pushing up against all your insecurities (good. that’s a good thing, actually). So, this brings us to another reason why awakening can lead you to feel disconnected, isolated, out of tune with the world around you:
REASON 03: YOU DON’T SHARE
Do you feel at ease discussing this whole new unfamiliar and somewhat strange journey with your friends? Typically, it’s not really the kind of topic you’re going to throw at your colleagues when you meet at the coffee counter… And when you’re not sure if you’re not actually going crazy yourself, you may hesitate bringing it up with your closer friends, too. We all have a deeply ingrained fear of rejection – so for most of us, we feel safest just keeping the ‘crazy’/’shameful’ stuff to ourselves, no matter how lonely it makes us feel. The fear of rejection is one of our biggest vulnerabilities and insecurities – because in the earlier days of humanity, acceptance by the tribe meant survival, and rejection meant increased risk of death.
So let’s dive into three ways you can move forward from here.
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three tips on how to move forward
that are kind & empowering to everyone involved
(you included)
so you’ll know what to do when you’re feeling lonely on this path of spiritual awakening
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1. GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO BE BOTH UNCOMFORTABLE & CONTINUE EXPLORING
Meaning,
- having doubt is so natural in this first phase of the journey because exploring your intuitive wisdom isn’t something you’ve ever been taught. And it’s still stigmatized in most of society. Just think about the words witch, healer, psychic and all the ickiness associated with it. The stigma around everything that isn’t rational and logic and what cannot be easily explained. You are opening up to your intuitive gifts – and the experience of being different from the other people for whom that hasn’t happened, yet, is uncomfortable. How different would things be if everyone simply flowed between logical and intuitive wisdom, all the time? There would be none of this doubt, anxiety, and isolation, right? That’s what we’re all creating together, through our conversations. How amazing is that?!
- you are heading into unknown territory. As one of my clients shared so beautifully, “I know there’s something else. I can absolutely feel there’s something else that is flowing with wisdom within me. There’s something there that I want to go explore, that is calling me forward.” So go, explore. You’ll start to find a balance between logic and intuition, a beautiful flow where they work together and enhance one another. But often, we have to go through this phase first where there’s anxiety and doubt, and we’re not sure if this “new” form of wisdom is actually to be trusted. Embrace kindness towards yourself and your journey – being okay with this phase of doubt and anxiety, yet continuously exploring what this new dimension to life is guiding you to.
2. SEEK PEOPLE WHO CAN SUPPORT YOU
Seek out communities where people have gone through an awakening or were born knowing their gifts. There’s so many groups on Facebook and wonderful feeds on Instagram (here’s mine) that there’s absolutely no need for you to walk your journey in isolation. It will help you in so many ways – reading about other people’s journeys is powerful and can offer relief, and you’ll be able to ask questions and see examples of how people integrate awakening with living a human life (which is ultimately what it’s all about).
You may also want to seek out more personalized support. In my own journey, I chose to invest in guidance and support with a coach. It felt like a really big leap into the unknown… and I wasn’t entirely sure that this was a sane decision, seeing as I was going to pay several thousands of dollars for <gasp> intuitive coaching. I didn’t know if this intuition thing was going to turn out to be something major or just a minor detour on my own journey. My logical brain scoffed at the extravagance of it all. And yet, I knew I so dearly wanted to be held in this journey. It felt scary, and confusing, and I wasn’t sure if this awakening was the best thing to ever happen to me, or absolute disaster (and complete cray-cray). I just knew I wanted someone to have my back. To help me navigate the intense doubt and anxiety, guide me in becoming more comfortable with all the intuitive messages pouring in, and make it a more grounded experience of awakening.
That initial support has been absolutely invaluable in my own journey – and it’s something I absolutely love to guide my own clients with. If you feel you would love some personalized guidance and loving space-holding as you take your next steps on your journey of awakening, do reach out to me. We can schedule a 30-minute call to discuss exactly what type of support would be most effective.
3. EMBRACE THIS AS YOUR PERSONAL JOURNEY (aka how & where to TALK about this)
Do you HAVE to talk about your journey? Well… in my opinion, only if you want to. For many people, their journey of awakening is a very privately cherished part of their spiritual path, and so it might be a comfort for you to know that this is a valid choice. I just want to mention this because
some of the conversations online can put a lot of pressure on us to SHARE about our journeys.
I remember feeling so confused and uncomfortably pressured when I would read something like “you’re one of the first generations of light-beings, you NEED to talk about this and share your journey so you can help awaken others”.
Uhmmm…. yes. I can see why that would feel important (more on that below). AND.
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choice is at the center of this.
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here are 2 questions for you that can help guide your choices
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▼is this simply a new personal exploration in your journey in life?
▼or do you feel like it will at some point be something your integrate more publicly into your work and/or the visible aspects of your life?
As an example, I choose to share about my beliefs publicly. That’s because something within me CALLS me towards that. I help other women get comfortable with this journey and step into the fullest expression of their truth and soul essence and heart’s desires – sharing about my own journey is such a big part of that (because how else would you know it’s possible, and real?)
Here’s what I want you to know: it’s not an obligation. You may feel a strong calling to share, or not. And always, ALWAYS, there’s this truth: you decide. Even if you feel called to share more openly, you decide how much you share, and with whom. And it’s perfectly fine to keep it more private as you set your first steps on the path. Allow yourself to know what feels important to share, now, and what is still too raw and insecure. You’ll know. You’ll also know when you’re just chickening out, and next time, you’ll get to choose to do things differently. or not.
You get to decide when and with whom you talk about this.
Here’s some examples to get you going:
▼ with your colleagues and acquaintances:
You are under no obligation to become this hugely different person in your social circles.
It’s about KINDNESS, really. Mostly towards yourself. You don’t have to entertain anyone at a cocktail party with your stories about crazy-ass happenings with invisible beings (which is what we can end up doing if we get sucked into saviour / need-to-convince-others energy). So take a moment to decide what you feel comfortable sharing with people you don’t know that well. If you feel excited to invite others in, sure! Or when asked about it, you might choose to just say something basic, such as “yes, I believe we all have a soul and that there’s guidance coming through that can help us in our life, we’re not just the mind as we’ve always been told” and that may be all you say about it.
It comes down to discernment. You don’t have to go and put yourself in situations where you have to defend your beliefs or open yourself to ridicule from any random stranger. And there may just as well be random strangers whom you totally can talk universe, manifesting, crystals and magic with. Follow your intuition with this one, yeah?
▼ with your family and loved ones:
My husband isn’t into soul/intuition (neither was I before), and so as I started to explore this new dimension to my experience of life, we’ve had to talk about this. I mean, I totally get it – I used to be soooooo logical and analytically focused myself – this new, intuitive-based experience of life completely threw me for a loop, too.
It’s been uncomfortable. We solved this by having a talk (plural) about it. Things you might want to explore together: “okay, do we bring this into conversations? Or is it simply a new part of my personal path and it’s not necessarily part of our joint explorations/discussions?” “how much of your distrust of this can you bring into our daily life? how much of my obsession with this can I bring into our daily life?” “how will we talk about our frustration with each other’s point of view?” “can I still love you, and can you still love me, now that we’re seeing life so differently?”
The same goes for our children. I felt very unsure of how, and IF, to involve them in my newly found amazingness-of-life. Again, your own inner wisdom will tell you how to move forward with this; for me, I’ve been guided to just do my thing, and give them space. If they ask questions then I’ll aim for a neutral, objective answer. Because I want them to still feel free to make up their own minds. I want them to have their own personal journey and choices.
And basically, that’s the main point of all of this right there.
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In and of itself, a spiritual awakening is a very, very personal journey.
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None of us are ever going to have the same journey, and even the situations that trigger our awakening are just so diverse. You cannot really compare this to anyone else’s experience. So, please remember:
▼It’s your journey.
▼You have a choice in how you share with other people about this journey.
▼It’s important that you leave the other people in your life the freedom of their own journeys. Because ultimately, that’s what sovereignty is all about. Be discerning about why you are wanting to share, and steer away from any beliefs that you *need* to save everyone else.
▼And remember, there is support available for you. You don’t have to walk this journey alone. This is as much a part of being human as anything else: we can hold space for each other as we walk though this messily beautiful experience of life. If you’d love my support and guidance as you walk your journey, book a free call with me here to discuss what that could look like ♥
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